The length of his ill-conceived affair is presently somewhat hazy, but there was certainly more than one occasion on which he was unfaithful to his wife and his marriage vows. Besides becoming an object of ridicule and the target of numerous tasteless jokes, Mr. Edwards, and indeed all cheating spouses, are flirting with danger when they embark on illicit liaisons.
Anyone who engages in sex outside of marriage is not exactly a model of propriety. The married deceiver may get more than he bargained for, in the form of a variety of sexually-transmitted diseases. The most serious, HIV and AIDS remain incurable. If infected, the patient must take a daily cocktail of drugs to keep on living, although his life span may be significantly shortened. In addition, he puts his wife at risk by continuing to engage in conjugal relations before symptoms of his disease appear.
He also puts himself and his paramour at risk, should either of their marriage partners become suspicious of their clandestine affair. Murder has been committed for less. If the partner is young and single, there may be a raging father or brother in the background, anxious to avenge the scoundrel who seduced their daughter or sister.
The cheating spouse will lose the trust of his wife. His marriage will be irrevocably damaged. If the union can ever be patched up, it will take months of expensive and in-depth counselling. Even then, he will never again be gifted with the same wholehearted confidence and devotion of his wife.
John Edwards' behavior was all the more shameful because his dying wife, Elizabeth, was tortured by the knowledge of his continuing adulterous affair. She may have known about the impending birth of his illicit child. His behavior probably caused her even more anguish than the cancer that ravaged her ever-weakening body.
Perhaps the greatest long-term damage will be suffered by his children. They are likely to be the butt of jibes and jokes at school, as their peers follow the latest developmemts of his trial. How can they continue to love and respect a parent who has caused them such shame and embarrassment?
In addition, as a father, he has lost all moral authority over their behavior in their teen-age years. The boys may think they have a proclivity for a promiscuous lifestyle because, "...after all, you can't fight your genes, can you?". The girls may be left with attitudes of contempt and hostility toward all males, which they will never overcome.
Mr. Edwards had a promising political career ahead of him.He was as a serious presidential candidate. He threw away a promising future for an illicit affair with a staff photographer whom he was careless enough to impregnate. Good judgement is clearly not John Edwards' greatest attribute.
Even cheating spouses who are not in the public eye lose the respect of their colleagues, friends and neighbors when their treachery becomes general knowledge, as it eventually will. No claudesdine relationship can be hidden indefinitely.
When indiscretions becomes general knowledge, no employer will trust the perpetrator with a position of trust and responsibility. If he can't be loyal to his wife and family, he's certainly not a likely candidate to be a faithful employee or an asset to the company.
Anyone contemplating being unfaithful to their marriage vows would be well advised to take note of John Edward's experience and reconsider. At risk is their life, health, marriage, their children's love, respect and emotional health , and their own career. Is it worth the risk? Only the most deranged, arrogant, and self- deluded individual would reply to this query in the affirmative.
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